What my 20s have taught me so far
Hi folks! You can find me over at Umm... Now What? today, writing about shackin' up with your significant other. In fact (**shameless plug alert!**), you can find me there every Monday!
As my regular readers have surely figured out by now, this time of year is madness for those of us navigating GradStudent Land (it's not fun like Disneyland, trust me), hence my intermittent tendencies to drop off the map. As such, I leave you with promises of Princessy TLC in the future, and the very first piece that I wrote for the above mentioned website, about the important lessons I've learned in the almost seven years I've been floating around in my twenties.
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Your parents are real people. They are not just the perpetual icon of Mom and Dad. And, yes, this means with some very real, and very petty, flaws.
... but my mom still knows a lot more about my life than I would have ever expected. Like the times I thought I had really convinced her I was sober, or that my boyfriend had slept on the pull-out couch. She always knew the truth, but just let me get away with things sometimes.
Going to a movie alone is nowhere near as intimidating as you would expect.
Neither is living alone.
Neither is being single. Especially when the alternative is to stay in a lackluster relationship.
Nothing reveals who your true friends are quicker than an unexpected catastrophe.
More can be discovered about a new city by wandering aimlessly with yourself than by following a guidebook.
It is never worth it to try to save an alcoholic.
Wait as long as you can to get a credit card. I miraculously waited until I'd graduated from college, and am really glad my 20 year old self didn't have access to "unlimited" funds.
Just go ahead and do the very thing you are hesitant to do. This is how I ended up in my current job, which scared the crap out of me when I initially heard about it, but has been one of the best challenges I've ever taken.
You will gain weight in your early 20s. Even if you aren't eating bad cafeteria food-- it's not just the 'Freshman 15'
Live music is the world's best distraction.
It is always a good idea to have a unique signature dish. You never know when you will need to impress someone over dinner, and spaghetti and tomato sauce don't always cut it. Mine? Balsamic beef stir fry or peanut curried chicken.
Everybody says it would be a great idea to move it together. Don't always believe them.
It isn't worth it to take on other people's timelines.
A lot of girls like sex as much as, if not more than, boys. (Myself included.)
You always wait too long to quit a bad job or end a bad relationship.
It always takes double the amount of time to prepare food as it claims on the recipe.
Just because he knows you have a boyfriend doesn't mean he won't try to kiss you after a few drinks.
The impossible decisions of today are merely the taken for granted facts of tomorrow.
You are the only constant in every relationship problem you have. ... although it always easier to blame the series of other people.
The boy who tells you that you are sexy when you talk about something smart is worth a million boys who tell you that you look sexy in a bikini.
Your parents are real people. They are not just the perpetual icon of Mom and Dad. And, yes, this means with some very real, and very petty, flaws.
... but my mom still knows a lot more about my life than I would have ever expected. Like the times I thought I had really convinced her I was sober, or that my boyfriend had slept on the pull-out couch. She always knew the truth, but just let me get away with things sometimes.
Going to a movie alone is nowhere near as intimidating as you would expect.
Neither is living alone.
Neither is being single. Especially when the alternative is to stay in a lackluster relationship.
Nothing reveals who your true friends are quicker than an unexpected catastrophe.
More can be discovered about a new city by wandering aimlessly with yourself than by following a guidebook.
It is never worth it to try to save an alcoholic.
Wait as long as you can to get a credit card. I miraculously waited until I'd graduated from college, and am really glad my 20 year old self didn't have access to "unlimited" funds.
Just go ahead and do the very thing you are hesitant to do. This is how I ended up in my current job, which scared the crap out of me when I initially heard about it, but has been one of the best challenges I've ever taken.
You will gain weight in your early 20s. Even if you aren't eating bad cafeteria food-- it's not just the 'Freshman 15'
Live music is the world's best distraction.
It is always a good idea to have a unique signature dish. You never know when you will need to impress someone over dinner, and spaghetti and tomato sauce don't always cut it. Mine? Balsamic beef stir fry or peanut curried chicken.
Everybody says it would be a great idea to move it together. Don't always believe them.
It isn't worth it to take on other people's timelines.
A lot of girls like sex as much as, if not more than, boys. (Myself included.)
You always wait too long to quit a bad job or end a bad relationship.
It always takes double the amount of time to prepare food as it claims on the recipe.
Just because he knows you have a boyfriend doesn't mean he won't try to kiss you after a few drinks.
The impossible decisions of today are merely the taken for granted facts of tomorrow.
You are the only constant in every relationship problem you have. ... although it always easier to blame the series of other people.
The boy who tells you that you are sexy when you talk about something smart is worth a million boys who tell you that you look sexy in a bikini.
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33 comments:
am i first?
i love this list. especially the one about the relationship problems. so true.
Being alone is pretty easy after a while.
you just get used to it.
so true so true....
I also learnt this: worrying about getting to 30 all the way through your twenties is a waste of time.
On everything - agreed.
Great list - especially having a signature dish. Mine is chili - just about chilly enough for another pot.
These life lessons are fabulous. Seriously. We should all keep a running tab of what we've learned in our 20's (and 30's!).
Though, I learned something interesting this weekend. A friend's father added her to his credit card when she was only a few months old. But, never told her about it. He had great credit. And by the time she went to apply for a mortgage, hers was through the roof. Though, the risks in doing something like that as a parents are great.
Those last two should be put on a pillow
I think that's one of the most inspired posts i've seen in quite some time.
I identify with so many of these.
And I am proud to say I have got to 29 without a credit card. I accidentally got a Warehouse store card once, bought one top, paid it off and never used it again. And my overdraft is a mere 200 pounds. On a bad day.
:)
this list is so incredibly true. i'm pretty sure i've experienced almost all of these so far in my 20s, haha.
I love this this -- and sat here shaking my head yes after all of them!
I agree with most of your points...
And yes, there is NOTHING more erotic than a woman who can have a meaningful discussion.
I like the last one. Likewise, brains are the sexiest trait on a guy.
great words of wisdom!!
You never drop off the blogoland boulevard for long. You are the rock of the ethernet shores...
How soon until the end of the road. If you don't mind a question posed from the peanut gallery, how long until you get more letters added to what must amount to a long and wondrous sounding name?
Wow, I just joined the twenty something bloggers network and it's so nice to connect with those going through the same feelings, ups and downs, and allergies to BS that I sometimes feel I bear alone.
Great list and so true about living alone and walking around new cities with just your mind and a good pair of shoes.
I think I agree with everything. absolutely everything
Last class ever, ehh?
Well, even if you have a million more responsibilities to go, we'll be here to listen to the profound wisdoms gained, as well as the fun, quirky minutiae that you love to bring to us.
And keep reading Bukowski when you can, that stuff is good for a soul. Read a collection called "Love is a Dog from Hell". I have it right here in front of me, and I swear by it. It actually was something I grabbed at sort of random--I just liked the name. But it's one of his best. That or "What matters most is how well you walk through the fire" is also a great collection, just to get you going in a good direction for him.
Peace out!
The impossible decisions of today are merely the taken for granted facts of tomorrow.
Truer words have never been said.
I love this list, just like I loved your post over at the other place :)
And - good luck with all the end-of-the-year grad school stuff!
i love this post. so much wisdom!
I like this list tons...
but i might argue facebook /youtube as the greatest distractions versus live music...
what was that point you made about petty things? :-)
A great list, got me thinking about many things while I'm still in my 20s!
Great List! But the weight gain? Really? Can we like set it back 5 pounds or something, you know, like daylight savings time--weightsaving years....le sigh.
You always wait too long to quit a bad job or end a bad relationship.
So freakin true.
A lot of great points! I was single for two years when I was in my 20's once. It was a pretty good time. Lots of drinking was done and not because I was alone either. ;)
Maybe I'll make a similar list about my experiences in my 30's considering I only have about two years until I'm (gulp!) in my 40's.
i exclaimed "yes!" internally to EVERYTHING on that list. loves it!
My lessons:
1) Everything you think is steady can disappear overnight.
2) Make as many friends as you can, you will need them.
3) Don't get too comfortable with anything or anyone.
Um, every one of these. Yes, yes, yes. I should bookmark this and refer to it periodically.
The only thing I can think to contribute is:
There has never been and will never be a better time to live with your back against the wall, so do it as much as you are able.
hi, I just found your blog, and I would agree with every one of these points ... well spoken!
You know it's a great list when I found myself thinking happily "I was so glad I figured that one out" on some & with a scolding tone "when are you going to get that into your thick skull" on others!
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