Thursday, December 18, 2008

Birthday girl!

Why, yes, that is my armpit, in all its glory!
...specifically, at around 2am last Friday, after many martinis and shots to celebrate my birthday, and my development of a new dance, called the Sexy Robot.

(But before the 45-year old man with a mullet tried to pick me up, and acted shocked when I didn't follow simply follow him like a lapdog as requested.)

(And also before the Duke, in a very drunken state, pointed at said mulleted-- and very large-- man and shouted "He tried to pick you up?!")

If anyone is counting, it doesn't look like 27 has magically granted me that sudden burst of maturity, either... though I've kind of stopped expected it now.

So, yes, another year has came and went, and here I am, diving head first into my late 20s. I suppose I could do a retrospective of sorts, you know, 26 things I learned at 26.

However, I'm afraid this is where my age may actually start to show, my lessons may start to be becoming a little more tedious--less about how to seduce guys and rid hangovers (though, seriously, Gatorade before you go to bed will save your life), and more about practical and academic matters.

#7- Make sure to always run your garburator before you leave for a week, for there may still be some food in there, which gets smelly in a hurry.

#18- Asparagus is great steamed and baked!

#24- Think about which statistics package you want to use for your data before you decide on a Mac or a PC, because some stats programs aren't readily available on Macs.

LAME.

So, instead, I'm passing the buck over to you (birthday girls have this right)-- come out and play! Delurk for my birthday! Say hi and tell me about your best or worst birthday ever!


(or you could, you know, bake me a cake, but I'm expecting this may be a little simpler)

(and, for an extra side of guilt trip, keep in mind that I am always secondary this time of year due to my birthday's proximity to Christmas, as any holiday baby can attest to.)

55 comments:

Caz said...

Amen to that! As a Thanksgiving baby there's even less propensity for people to party as everyone's home with family and not focusing on getting drunk.

Brett said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!
Worst birthdays i forget, but some high lights.
A fancy dress party on the Nile, been taken a mile underground to a working coal face, all my friend making it through the snow to celebrate my 40th, oh and each day i wake up with my wife.

Tough Girl 101 said...

yeah, 21. Nuff said.

Michelle said...

Happy belated birthday. It looks like (from your armpit, that is) you had a great time.

Worst birthdays. Where do I start?

14th birthday was spent in a car driving through northern California. We stopped for the night at a casino hotel and my dad and brother went off to gamble and left me alone in the hotel room. I was expecting them to come back with a cake or something but they didn't.

15th birthday - nobody remembered. It was totally 16 candles with me dropping hints and sulking around, without the hot guy at the end and a cake.

16th birthday - speaking of cakes, this one takes it in terms of crappest birthdays. I was sent to a boot camp for troubled teens (I was in no way troubled and by 'troubled' I mean 'delinquent') and I spent my birthday doing manual labour in the desert. 8 hours bent over a hoe digging a trail. And there were scorpions. Talk about a great time.

I've had a lot of good ones since then, but after so many bad experiences there need to be hundreds more good experiences and I'm only 26. The balance hasn't tipped yet.

Hope said...

My best birthdays have all been destination birthdays. For my 22nd I flew to Barcelona with three of my friends where we ate glorious paella, shopped like crazy and just walked and walked and walked all over the place.

My 17th was spent in Paris on a class trip where we all got drunk in a hotel in Montmartre causing me to miss the scheduled visit to some exhibition of some famous artist. (His name escapes me at the moment. The one with the melting clocks?)

Anyhoo, happy birthday lady. Welcome to 27. It's a riot!
xx

Essentially Me said...

Happy Birthday!

lspoon said...

Aw, yay for birthdays! Yours looks like it was a great one! :)

Matt said...

Nice armpit...

K and/or K said...

Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!

You look like you can party with the best of rock stars!

Jess said...

Happy birthday! I have to say for some reason I don't have many memories of best or worst birthdays. They've all been pretty decent.

Erica said...

Haaaaaappy Birthday!!

Mandy said...

Happy Birthday!!!

One of my favorite birthday memories was from my senior year in college. My birthday fell during exam week and two days before my college graduation. I was stressed about passing a few of my finals, a few of my best college friends made jello shots, broke out the Captain Morgan, and made me a cake. Finals were forgotten and I still graduated. :-)

SMARTBuddy said...

Happy Birthday! Im 3 days to go until the big 30, which will eaisily be my worse Birthday ever. Surely?!

verybadcat said...

Happy Birthday! :)

Best birthday ever? Year before last. I got super spoiled and had great fun....

Next year will be great too, as I'm the first of the trifecta to turn 30, and they're going to make a big deal, I have a feeling...

Surfergrrl said...

hhm, baked asparagus is awesome...with some olive oil and garlic. Oh, happy birthday! :)

tmamone said...

Happy birthday!

Nice pit.

A. said...

Happy [belated] Birthday!
Welcome to the 27's! They aren't that bad, or that "grown-up"...

Best Birthday: Any birthday since I met my husband - he makes a really big deal out of birthdays & spoils me rotten, with everything from surprise trips to Vegas & dinners in Paris.

I hope you had a wonderful birthday! It sure looks that way from the photo...

S. said...

Maturity is overrated anyway. (said a 23 year old)

My fave b-day was my 21st. Went to New York!! Soooo much fun!

(I'm from SoCal. That's 3.5 hours away from Vegas. Been there and doing that!)

S. said...

OH YEAH! WORST Birthday.

My 16th.

My Birthday is September 11th.
'nuff said.

EF said...

Alas- Merry birthday!
Man that sucks losing out to Jesus every year, like he doesn't get everything else he wants 'cause of who his dad is!...I bet you out drink him!

poodlegoose said...

Eh, I never really celebrate my birthday ever, very much like the other Thanksgiving birthday. On more than one occasion, I got a turkey "for my birthday" and that was it. Yeah, good times.

Hope you had a great one :) As I was reading this, I was thinking, "Oh, I should send her a card!" and then I remembered that I didn't have your address. Guess you'll just have to deal with a blog post ;)

Paula said...

My best birthdays I remember were 28 and 29 - which is odd cos for 28 I was happy cos I had a nice man and 29 I was single but they were both good in their own ways.

Worst? Probably 18 and 21. Not cos nothing particularly awful happened . . . they were just kind of non-events for things that were meant to be two of the biggest birthdays of my life!

Ant said...

Happy Birthday fellow 18th-er! I'm celebrating by applying a defibrillator to my blog...

Clear!

*Kthonk*

Katelin said...

happy belated birthday! sounds like quite the birthday celebration, a mulleted man hitting on you? very nice, haha. if it makes you feel any better on my 21st a guy wearing a cut off tshirt and cut off jeans with socks and sandals kissed me on the cheek, it was so wrong yet so hilarious. oh birthday memories.

Babs said...

happy birthday!

on my 19th birthday I went on a float trip with all my friends. I ran out of beer REAL quick and was so desperate to maintain my buzz that I flashed a 15 year old boy for 2 cans of busch light. afterwards I passed out on my parents' front lawn in their pleasant-ville neighborhood wearing only my bikini.

can I just say winner? ok.

miss button said...

Happy Birthday!

My funniest birthday experience was one year when my dad called my in mid October, and arranged a Sunday brunch. (We're not close, so this is unusual). When we got there I realised that it was October 18th. My birthday is November 18th.
He'd realised between the arranging of the date, and the actual date that he had the wrong month, but could hardly call and say "I'll have to cancel, cos, turns out it's NOT your birthday after all..."

Oh, Dad...

Crushed said...

Hey, just enjoy yourself!

You only get one life.
I'm thirty and I'm partyiong solid all this weekend!

Many happy returns.

And you look like you made the most of it :)

Tony said...

A: Happy Birthday.

B: I absolutely sympathize! My birthday is New Year's Eve. Everyone is throwing a party, none of them are for you, and you get "joint christmas-birthday presents." SO lame.

C: Worst Birthday: 15th. We woke up at 5:30 am, I was greeted with a groggy "Happy Birthday, bud." before we packed into the car and drove 4 hours (one way) to visit my sister in rehab. My sister whom I despised. My sister who had made my earlier childhood absolutely miserable. The rationale? "Well, she had to spend christmas alone." Well, she was addicted to meth. Not my fault.

Oh, and we got a flat tire in the middle of no where, had no jack, and had to wait in the car, in the snow, for 2 hours 'till a tow truck came.

WORST. BIRTHDAY. EVER.

Jeff said...

Happy B-day girl! Worst birthday ever? That's easy. My 21st (and remember this meant I was of legal drinking age) my mom really wanted to be a part of it so we started the evening with a cookout at my parents. My mom thought it would be hilarious to hire a stripper for me. Yeah, that's right...lap dance in front of my mom. I still have nightmares.

The fun didn't end there either. Later that night we hit the clubs (sans mom, finally) and we met a group a girls who agreed to spend the rest of the evening celebrating my day. They were only waiting for one of their girlfriends to join them. Turns out the girl they were waiting on was none other than the stripper my mom had hired. Much laughing (at my expense) ensued. I still have emotional scars. At least it's a great story.

Errant Gosling said...

A very happy birthday to you. And no, 27 doesn't make you any wiser or more mature. It's a ripoff.

Therapeutic Ramblings said...

Happy b-day.

nicoleantoinette said...

Ha, I wish I really could bake you a cake!

Here- virtual cake. Yummm :)

dmb5_libra said...

armpit shots are the best!

happy belated birthday!

Tina Vaziri said...

Why do people still have mullets? :(

Happy birthday! :D

t.k.foster said...

I like the armpit. Happy Birthday Pointful; be careful, older men aren't always bad ;).

australiandaisy said...

Happy birthday!! And Happy Holidays as well. :)

My best birthday was last year when I met some Australians and very dramatically changed the course of my life. lol. Don't want to be boring and repetitive so we'll leave it at that. :)

Oh and p.s. - how sa-weet that you played Anne - that is awesome!!

A Margarita said...

Happy belated birthday!

Daisy said...

Happy Birthday! May I say fist off that I just got home to find a really exciting parcel from Canada in my letterbox and I'm so thrilled with the CD, thank you so much!! I especially can't wait to listen to Paris is Burning. At the moment Paris is actually Freezing.

Ok so my worst birthday ever was probaby my 5th, when I cried all day because I had asked for Bedtime Bear from the Carebears and when I opened the present and found it was a stuffed toy Bedtime Bear I freaked out and thought he was dead. I really thought I was going to get real live Bedtime Bear. Bad times.

And the best one was probably when I was 10. I was seriously excited to be into "Double Figures" and I had a cake shaped like a poodle so it was pretty awesome.

Hope you had a good one and Merry Christmas x D

Ultra Toast Mosha God said...

That's a fine armpit. Well done.

libby said...

happy belated on the blog! i got to you in time on FB. WOO! you know i heart you! best bday? this past year...it's the best when EVERYONE turns up for your birthday! so much fun!!!

Krystal said...

:( My bday is monday and I'm turning 26...I can't muster up any enthusiasm to go celebrate even! tell me it won't be so bad!

Deutlich said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It still amuses me we were born the same year, just a week and a day apart.

ZenDenizen said...

That's one hell of a wax job.

Happy Birthday!

Kelli said...

Happy Birthday! I love reading your blog! Have a great weekend! :)

Mrs4444 said...

Kind of outing yourself in that pic, aren't you? The next time I see that armpit, I am so going to know it's yours! :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Crashdummie said...

Hey gurley, happy b'day!
Glad to see u guyz had a blast. Every excuse to celebrate is good enough for me :)

Psychgrad said...

Happy birthday! I may need to email you about stats programs on a Mac...I'm thinking to getting a Mac in the near future.

Meghan said...

Happy Birthday! May 27 be filled with lots of laughter and love, and no mullets.

Bayjb said...

Happy Birthday! Your armpit is awesome.

eric1313 said...

Happy Birthday, Princess! (yes, late again...)

And yes, that is one hell of an armpit.

You might as well post a whole picture one day. But then again you do value privacy, something that I understand.

But what of your armpit? It's been outed. How sad...

And yes, by the way, I did read Ultra Toasts tail of his encounter with you and the Duke. Sounds like it was a lot of fun, though it was sadly limited.

Been out of the loop because on top of being sick (I'm better now, though), I really do have to move. It's a matter of Maslow's hierarchy. I'm kinda starving up here, but I have a chance to move to Hot Springs, Arkansas (2 million people and 11 million chickens, go AK!) where my best friend Justin is inheriting his father's construction company. I can have any job I want I have been told, but also, him and I used to make games and we now want to continue this with actual adult gusto and monetary backing. We designed a role playing game based on ghost hunting and Allister Crowley type wizardry (BS madness, but fun all the same) as well as a huge strategic game about--you guessed it--world domination.

The only catch is my community college credits will not transfer so when I get into the writing program down there, I'll have to start over with only my university credits. But they do have an excellent journalism program, so I think this will lead to me one day getting paid rather well to type... then I can do it all the time without the worries that have been nagging me for a bit of time now.

Anyway, yes I know I brought this up before, but it was hard to go. I really wanted to try and make things work around here. But with the current economy, my whole family is in trouble, as about half of them are employed by the automakers. And I'm sure you know about their problems... (I think it's a perfect opportunity to nationalize a large part of our industrial base and lead the way for us to get away from the old free market econ that is becoming so bloated and top heavy.)

Anyway, that's the scoop.

Abbey said...

Worst bday: 25 - crying in the library in a relatively unused section. Alone and studying for finals and no one to celebrate with.

Mega said...

I already told you this, but Happy Bday FBBFF. Thats a nice armpit, I must say.

Z said...

Happy Birthday!!! (A bit late, but whatever... It's the thought, right? Right?)

As for a memory, well - I try to avoid my birthday at all costs. Other peoples bdays? Hell yeah! My own? Not so much. So - lame. No memories. Sorry...

JaneB said...

A belated happy birthday...
@
*****
lllllll
lllll
lll

Angela said...

(delurking)